Blissalicious Blog

 

Over the past few years I have slowly learned to be a whole lot kinder to myself.  Instead of making myself wrong for everything, beating myself up for what I haven't done or berating myself for what I should have done but didn't, I've been discovering what it could be to be kind and nurturing to me.  And truly - it has been quite a trip!  I had no idea I was so unkind... to me!

To change this requires a level of vulnerability that we rarely gift ourselves with.   To be kind and nurturing to ourselves, we have to connect with who we truly be.  And that being is a beautiful, vulnerable, aware bundle of energy who is always doing the best they know how.

But mostly we don't want to believe that... we want to believe we are some f***ed up insane idiot that doesn't have a clue.  I'm here to tell you - that could not possibly true... you would not have found yourself reading this if it was...

When we get really vulnerable with ourselves we become willing to look at all of us... even the bits we have kept hidden because we thought they were just far too wrong for anyone to see, including us.  Oops! Lately I've been playing with discovering some more of the 'hidden bits'... and I've seen over and over that underneath everything there is just joy, ease and peace... the building blocks of bliss!

What if we could just be with what is? With no point of view?  Just you, being you... without any judgment... without buying anyone elses interesting point of view about who you are or who you should be... Would that create something totally different in your universe?  Go play just for a day or two... and let us know what shows up for you!

xox Lisa

 

It’s been a while since I’ve written about the burnout beastie, apparently today is the day! 

In this moment far too many people that I care about are fighting the burnout beastie… and something needs to change!  

I’ve have fought the burnout beastie a few too many times and I’ve come out the other side every single time – knowing more, being more and having greater awareness than I believed possible. If, today,  you are sitting on the edge, going ‘wtf?’, I have written this for you.  Sense it as a big energetic hug that can change everything in an instant!

The burnout beastie sneaks up on you, stealthily turning a once joyful life into a shattering string of ‘Who am I and is this all there is?’ moments of overwhelm and despair.

In the worst of those times, I remember hanging on by a thread, waking up every morning, wondering if the thread would hold another day.  Wondering if it would be easier to just quietly, gently let go and allow the sad little burnout shell that was pretending to be me to just disappear into the nothingness…

I remember not being able to keep myself upright for more than about 3 hours at a time and continually going back to bed and crying for no reason except total exhaustion. I remember not being able to remember the beginning of the sentence or what I was talking about, being so incoherent that I could barely answer basic ‘yes or no’ questions… Questions like ‘would you like some chocolate?’ were pretty much beyond my cognitive capacity to deal with (difficult to believe now I know!)  It's a scary thing being 40 and seriously wondering if you have Alzheimers...

And I remember being extremely unhappy... (actually, let's not mention unhappy...it reminds me of being unhappy.)

It's been almost 5 years now since that was me. Most of all I remember wondering how the hell I had created such a mess and being terrified that it was never going to change. The burnout beastie had me so fried that I couldn’t decide if I should check-in to a psychiatric hospital or check-out… permanently.  I am so grateful that my decision-making capacities were non-existent at that time. So grateful that I had disabled myself to such a degree that I literally had no capacity to choose anything except to just BE!

Despite my total incapacity, somewhere inside I knew that neither of those choices could create the different possibility I was truly desiring, that had got me into this mess in the first place! And I knew that something had to change – massively.

What’s funny about burnout is that we always want the world outside to change.  We want the world to conform to our awareness of what could be possible… and we want to take everyone we know with us… the burnout beastie shows up when we are doing so much to create change that we can no longer just BE.

It’s our addiction to creating change and generating greater possibilities in other people that wears us out and takes us from being a catalyst for change, into a 'human doing' that desperately requires change.  People who get burnout are never happy with the status quo.  We know we have the potency to create a different reality and we want it now!  It’s how we go about it that sends us into the arms of the burnout beastie.

We tell ourselves a grand story about how much we care and how much we need to do to enable those around us to have different choices, mostly because they can’t see what we can (that bit could be true … they often can’t… or maybe they just don’t choose to?)

I bought this big fat burnout beastie lie for a long time.   How could things change if I wasn’t there? Always being the catalyst, always being there for other people, always making it easy for everyone… except the one person who needed it most… ME!

Well, when the burnout beastie comes to visit, you can’t be that for other people anymore… you don’t have it in you! There is no steam left to power the train!!  It’s over baby… you are officially on the intensive care ‘do not disturb’ list… until you change you… until you start caring for you… until you start feeding and nurturing the amazing being that is you. There is nothing for you to do except be.

It’s a hard pill to swallow.  You don’t want to know that all of the people you have been the catalyst for will finally have to make their own choices and create their own possibilities.  Some of them will, some of them won’t.  And it’s not your job to change that.  You are the catalyst – you got the steam train running in some new directions… what they do with that energy is their choice – not yours.

So is now the time to put down all of the beasts of burden you are carrying around…  is now the time to look at what would truly work for YOU… and to actually just BE the possibilities you are aware of, rather than dragging the unwilling along for a bumpy ride down a dead-end track?

Yes, I know… you have a whole lot of “shoulds, have to’s and must do’s” and 'oh but's'  running around in your head right now.  You can’t possibly stop this now… there are people relying on you, you need the money… life won’t be worth living if you give up the thing you most want to create…

Every excuse you can come up with I have tried… and tried… and tried… and what you need to know is that the burnout beastie is now driving the train… and he doesn’t do train tracks… there are no refueling stops… so you are on a collision course to nowhere – unless you change something fast.

So this is what you are going to change.  You are going to start sensing what you truly desire and you are going to start nurturing you first, before anything… or anyone else.   That’s it.  Turn off the phone. Cancel stuff.  Change stuff… do whatever it takes to boot out the burnout beastie – it’s time to refuel. 

If you're not sure what refueling looks like... here are three of my favourites:

• Snuggle up with someone or something you adore...(even if it is a teddy bear or your dog!) ...stop thinking... allow peace to infuse your universe and just BE.
• Laugh.  Words cannot express how grateful I am for the friends who made me laugh and laugh and laugh until I cried during the darkest of those burnout beastie days... they literally saved my life.
• Play.  Oops... you've forgotten what that is like haven't you!  Find a small child who has total delight in their universe and rediscover a whole new universe of just being...
  

If you were choosing for you today, what would you choose?

This is not the end.  It is just the beginning.

Love you! xox Lisa

P.S.  When I removed the burnout beastie from my life I lost the person I thought I had to be... and I became the person I could BE - the one that truly could change anything... just by BEING... what if that could be possible for you?

Yesterday I was talking with a beautiful friend and she was sharing with me how she has been learning to fall in love with herself and how deeply magical and transforming that process has been for her. 

Mostly we yearn for intimacy on the outside of us, never dreaming that what we most desire is truly available within... I continue to learn that everything I desire is actually available inside of me... if I am willing to BE it, own it and choose it!

 

I hope you discover some deliciously joyful insights in this video that allow you to have the intimacy and connection you most truly desire...

Sending you blissbombs of gratitude for all you BE

xox

Lisa

Within this beautiful spiral shell there is darkness and light.  I had a wonderful conversation with a friend this week about how often we keep the darkness hidden away and squashed inside and only allow the light to be seen because that's what we have been told is 'acceptable'. 

Whether we admit it or not, somewhere in our depths, most of us have more issues than Vogue. And we keep them well hidden until such time as they burst to the surface, dripping unresolved emotions everywhere.  As the energy on our planet is in upheaval, so it is within us at this time.  Much is surfacing to be harmonised and resolved.

What could change if we were to start questioning what is 'acceptable' and to start to follow our own knowing?  It seems pretty clear that the traditional ways of dealing with the darkness hasn't exactly created peace and light in the world!!  From that space of clarity and inner knowing we can generate the peace and harmony that comes from resolving or espressing the dark and hidden places that have held us captive until now. 

When we get over the idea that the darkness is 'wrong' and the light is 'right' it opens a door for us to look at both aspects and how they can offer new possibilities.  As the divine feminine energy moves into place and we start to operate from a place of flow instead of force, all of us have the possibility of experiencing how much capacity the darkness has to create a potency in our life that allows greater possibilities to show up. 

This potency is created within us when we make peace with the darkness.  When we know that we have what it takes to move beyond the darkness.  When we have gratitude for the contributions the darkness has made in our life and we are willing to step into a lighter place without a backward glance.

Resolving the darkness is not an invitation to splatter your darkness everywhere all over people through fear, anger, abuse or any other emotion of force... It is an invitation to look at the darkness with awareness,  to remove its power to inflict harm, and allow the insights gained from that process to contribute to a different possibility for the rest of your life.  So what does this mean in practical terms?

Would you have more peace and harmony if you...

• stopped creating friction as a way of proving you are alive and looked for the possibilities of ease and joy?
• focused on what the lightness can contribute instead of what the darkness is not contributing?
• asked the darkness what it could contribute to you if you saw it differently?
• celebrated the darkness and turned on the party lights?
• reviewed everything in your life that is no longer serving you and simply let it go, without having to be 'right' or to explain and justify your choices?
• stopped creating your dreams from a fantasy based on the past, and simply looked at what you desire right now?
• allowed relationships and beliefs that are based in lack, fear and anger to slip quietly away?

I am definitely not suggesting you become a doormat, quite the opposite!  When we allow the darkness to have no power over us, and to contribute the potency it has created within us, we become very clear about what we are choosing.  We set boundaries, we speak up for ourselves and we follow the path that offers peace and harmony, even if we have to climb a couple of boulders along the way.  It is okay to roar!  It is important to be heard.  When you can do this from a space of darkness resolved, rather than the underlying unresolved issue, your potency will not be mistaken as anger! 

Peace and harmony can be created from darkness.  So wherever we see these energies playing out around us, it is up to us to ask 'What energies could I be, do or contribute here that could change this in an instant?'   When we stop contributing to disharmony, much can change... more space and lightness shows up on the inside and the outside!!

As I have followed this process in my own life over the past few weeks and months I have come to see the value in recognising both sides.  All of a sudden we see the 'thing' that keeps us in the spiral pattern of repeating an issue, rather than being able to graciously move into a lighter, more blissful, more joyful reality.  Once we have shone a light onto the 'thing' it can no longer trigger the darkness in us... instead we can wallow in the bliss and sparkle! Simply beautiful!

As we go, so goes the earth.  Every time we shift the darkness we allow more lightness into our beautiful planet.  That lightness both heals and allows for greater transparency in places where there is still unresolved darkness - for us personally and on a global scale... all change truly starts with us!

Have a beautiful Sunday... take a few moments to find some peace within :)
xx
Lisa

I have just spent four blissful days at an advanced Access Consciousness class in Brisbane where we laughed non-stop.  Change is totally joyful and blissful if we are willing for it to be lighter than a feather touch! 

Just when I thought I had finished with the being/doing conundrum I have been exploring over the past few months... up popped days of playing with the energy of this!  And in the willingness to explore it further I made a beautiful discovery. 

Access founder Gary Douglas says "Being is the capacity to create a totally different reality just by BEing you."  Now I know I already do this.  I know I can change what is, just by being present with people and having the willingness for change to occur... but what I didn't see (and what I am sure you never see for yourself either!) is how much potency we have in just BEing ALL that we are.

I am so deeply grateful to Gary for reflecting back to me the truth of the energy I BE... what I felt in those moments was indescribable...and it changed my entire universe in an instant.

I saw that there was nothing to judge in me, but plenty to be in allowance of.  I saw the immensity of my BEing and the infinite possibilities of allowing myself to be unlimited.  I saw that everything I require is already within me. I saw the pure joy and love that we all have wrapped up so tightly inside... and I saw the possibilities for the world if I was to be vulnerable enough to BE this beautiful energy without hiding. 

I am not sure what else to say except WOW! 

We are all so much greater than this reality would have us believe.  We are all so much greater than we are willing to see.  So what would it take for each of us to start shining that greatness into the world with a brightness and lightness that could transform anything, create anything and BE anything we choose? We are the gold and the change we are seeking...

If you have been wondering how to step up, know the time is now and the only thing you need to 'DO' is BE YOU!  Without limitation, without shame, without doubt.  If you are here now, you have a contribution to make.  If you are reading this know there are no mistakes... your time is now.  Would you hold my hand, take that first tiny step and invite the world to experience the brilliance of you?

xx Lisa

Image Gratitude

Freedom has been a recurrent theme in my life and when I read this I went 'OH YES!!'  This is so the place that I desire to operate from. 

Sometimes the greatest sensorial experiences are not so much physical but simply BEing.  When we feel the freedom of fully BEing who we are, so much changes in our universe and that of the people who come into contact with us!

When you meet people who have an inner freedom it is noticeable because of the sense of space and lightness that comes with them.  A few tools I use daily on my quest to BE free are:

• To see everything as an interesting point of view... when we are unmoved by the points of view put forward by other people (or our habitual selves) we have total allowance and total freedom.  No need for resisting and reacting when we are choosing freedom inside... it ceases to matter!
• To look at my limitations and ask 'Would an infinite being truly choose this?'  If not then why am I??? 
• To always be asking questions about what else is possible... I never settle for the limitations in front of me.  I am always looking for the possibility I haven't seen before or that has not shown up before because I was stuck in my (often) limited point of view.

These three tools sound very simple, but used on everything in your life will create immense amounts of that beautiful energy we call freedom!!  How much more freedom could we contribute to the universe?  Would there be a need for wars if enough of us were to choose freedom from the inside out?  When we care for ourselves in these nurturing ways, our bliss spreads through the universe... Nelson Mandela is living proof of this!

xox
Lisa

I woke up this morning with a head full of stuff... so many little things need attention over the next week and I was having a 'where to start' moment!  Because, actually, I didn't feel like working, I felt like messing about in the kitchen... an earlier trip to the Noosa Farmers Markets had put me in the inspiration zone!

One of the fastest ways to find your serenity (besides breathing deeply) is to do something you love.  So, I made some marinated feta... beautiful creamy danish feta, rich fruity virgin olive oil, and some fresh herbs from the garden... 10 minutes of creating bliss for my tastebuds!

Now I can imagine at least 10 luscious things I can do with this feta... and those creative thoughts are going to keep me happy and serene for quite a while (yes, I'm a food lush - just thinking about the possibilities makes me drool deliriously!!)

And now I'm ready to look at what really does require attention today if I want to have a free-flowing productive week!  So if you are looking for a little more serenity in your day... do the thing that will make you drool love and feel nurtured first... and once you feel more than a little bit happy, go and do the thing that really needs your love in this moment... pure bliss - I promise!!

xox
Lisa

I love bamboo - it reminds me of all that is good about resilience!  No matter how hard those bamboo stalks are bent, they can still spring back into shape!  Resilience is a journey we all go on after times of challenge.  The events of the last 10 months have left my body at less than optimum capacity and whilst I am aware of this and I manage my energy daily, occasionally I still have a hiccup!

Yesterday I spent a full day at speaker training and came home totally exhausted, not because I was doing anything much (listening mostly) but because I pushed my body beyond its current capabilities… a long day surrounded by lots of people in a cold room is clearly more than my body can cope with at the moment!  (And this is no reflection on the event or the wonderful people I was with, simply where my body was at on that day!)

So I came home, ate a warm dinner cooked by someone else (how did I get so lucky??), watched Masterchef, had a delicious long hot shower and went to bed where I promptly slept for 11 hours playing regenerative energy based meditations while I slept.  And I’ve woken up feeling 1000% better, but knowing I need to take it easy today.

There was a time in my life when, had I woken up feeling good, I would have jumped right back in, leaving little time for my body to build further resilience. Not anymore :-)  I value my health too highly and it is my current priority to build up reserves of physical and emotional resilience so that little can weigh me down!

This bounce back ability is within all of us, but sometimes we forget to tap into our inner knowing.  I have experimented with several hundred different tools for bouncing back over the past three years.  

There is probably at least 100 things that I know can make me feel better quickly and whenever I am not feeling at my best, I am quick to put the tools that feel rewarding in that moment into action. I don’t have a ‘formula’ for bouncing back, but I do have a set of questions I ask myself:

• What physical symptoms are showing up here?
• Who do these symptoms belong to?  Can I return them to sender?
• How am I feeling within myself?  Light or heavy?
• Has anything triggered this that needs addressing?
• What would be the fastest path to feeling more alive right now?
• What do I need to put in place for the next couple of days to fully bounce back?
• What else can I add to my life?
• What can I remove from my life?

Once I’ve had a look at the energy associated with all of these questions, I choose a course of action (or sometimes inaction – rest is a wonderful thing!) and look for the possibilities for feeling regenerated.  As a result, my dips are smaller and faster than they ever used to be and I can traverse life knowing that my bounce-back ability is never far away.

How often do you make yourself the priority?  Or are you always putting your own physical and psychological needs last?  Are you willing to truly give yourself the gift of nurturing and caring that will give you this same bounce back ability?

If you would like more bounce-back ability, join us on Monday nights for nurturing Bliss Essence teleconversations!

Image Credit

Love love love this interview with Tim Bothams, phenomenal sustainable farming expert and nurturer of our beautiful earth... (and conscious man who follows his bliss!) please listen in honour of Earth Day!  What if you could gift to the earth just by being happy?

And what if we could be more aware of our food choices... love my local farmers market too!
Would you be willing to be more conscious in your choices for you and the earth?  We can all contribute, wherever and whenever we choose!

Choose bliss...
xx
Lisa

(Image Credit - much gratitude to Pinterest)

My favourite Auntie sent me these beautiful pictures this morning... it reminded me of how important it is that we know we belong, no matter how different we are! 

I am always so grateful for the support of my family and the friends I have had since I was young (ok, I still am young ;-)  They know me and love me whatever I'm choosing for my life - even if it looks a little crazy to them!

Today is a day for basking in the love of those you know love you without judgment... and that includes yourself... spend a few minutes without judging yourself for anything and see how much more peaceful you are!

Wishing you a day filled with serenity, joy and celebrating the difference you BE!
x
Lisa